Lost

I'm so lost on how I got here. How I got this low into my life. Where did I go wrong? What happened to me? How did u neglect myself for so long? And still proceed to live? "Who am I? Why am I here? What does this all mean?" (Easy A) But on a…

Love and it’s difficulties

Love bounds you unwillingly, unexpectedly. It's normally puts you in a position of an uncontrollable sensation. You feel bounded to the other person. Like you owe your life to them. They are one of the most important things or people in your life. Love is hard. Hard for you – the person feeling the love…

The Funny Thing Is

Back on my birthday weekend, I got no attention. It was weird, because I always get attention, especially when it’s my birthday. Yeah, some guys bought me shots, but it wasn’t the “birthday attention” you expected, you know? But that woke me up. I decided that the year of 24, I would stop looking for…

Beloved – Week 12: Real Dating

GET OUT write down all the things that have been holding you back from making meeting with God a priority. what are your expectations and in what ways have those been met or not met? what can you cut back on to make room? I know I can answer the last question right off the…

1/365 of Kobe Year

This weekend I came to a realization. I don’t want to die alone. Granted I’m only 24 and have a whole life ahead of me. But the thought of being alone for the rest of my life scares me. The thought came from a very superficial thought but there’s so much depth behind it all. …

care.

Caring. The worst and best action. I recently found myself caring. Caring for someone I don’t even know. Caring on the level that I didn’t think I could for a person ever again. The way that you know that your walls have completely broken down. When you argue all day and you make up, but…

Beloved Week 11: MISS INDEPENDENT

GET IT OUT: what kind of pressure have you put on yourself to be independent? in what ways have you failed to ask GOD for help? have you been proud towards your relationships or GOD?  I always work, and when I am not working, I try to pick up shifts. I hate being dependent. I…

Beloved Week 10: If You’re Worried About Your Love Life

GET IT OUT: have you faced hardships and feelings of isolation from your relationships? are you worrying that those feelings or problems won’t be solved? are you feeling lonely and worried God doesn’t know your desire for companionship? are you worried that you’ll always be alone?  I have faced a lot of hardships and feelings…

Word of Thought

I just finished binge watching 13 Reasons Why amongst the past 3 days. I have never connected to a fictional character in my entire life. I have never resonated with someone or a story or a show ever. Hannah Baker’s life in the show was my life at Appalachian State. The worst five and a half…

Beloved Week 9: When Your Heart Hurts

What has left you feeling broken hearted? It may be a lost love, loss of a loved one, or broken friendship. But it could also be feelings of failure, disappointment, or hopelessness.

To Be Noticed 

All I ask is to be noticed. Not the noticed in “hey parents, look what I did today.” The noticed in that I don’t have to tell you I did something good. The noticed that you see me trying and changing for the better. The noticed that you are proud that I am you daughter….

Beloved Week 7: Rest & Trust the Best

What have you been seeking attention, affection, or affirmation from? Has it been from God or something else? Or perhaps God AND something else?

I have been seeking attention from boys and my parents.